Dreadful!

Life is difficult enough without such gross foreign beasts rampaging along the foreshore indulging in outrageously boisterous behaviour which is ill mannered, ill conceived and ill considered, thereby disturbing the peaceful calm of a balmy afternoon.

If humans desire to hurl themselves into water (!) should they be discouraged?

This acclaimed life-saving dog has been guarding a beach in Cornwall for 5 years and is responsible for saving 3 lives in that time.

However, last month the local authorities decided he was no longer welcome. Apart from the trifling fact that all dogs are banned from the sands, Bilbo failed his lifeguard test. He couldn’t do the mouth to mouth resuscitation.

Bilbo now has a huge fan following in England to restore him to his spot at the seaside, people running round with petitions, organising public meetings, and an international facebook group, ‘Keep Bilbo on the Beach’, with almost 3000 members.