Fridays are so relaxing these days. The woman always gets a little treat for both of us, like a tasty bit of prawn mousse for me and a profiterole for herself and we watch DVDs and fall asleep in the big comfy chair with the cushions.

I said mousse! Not mouse. There are no unwanted rodents left since I got rid of those rats who appeared in next door’s compost (they still haven’t thanked me, miserable beans that they are) and that was probably the last bit of hunting I’ll be doing till the warm weather returns. I don’t seem to have quite the spring in my step that I used to have. Less pounce in the paw you might say.

So while the woman is nodding off over that bloodcurdling Beowulf and Grendel (she watches it all the time which is a bit of a worry in itself) I get much more time to play around with her new phone and press all the blinking lights and dingling buttons.

I can’t smile for the camera of course. Not since my front tooth and I parted company. But I look like a real philosopher now. Which I am.

Tonight I will ponder the question ; What is truth?