Jubilation! I have been invited to join the M-Cats Club. For Man Cats, you understand.
No limp paws in M-Cats. (I assume the Club Founders know about the little nip and tuck of my early days.)
Now I have to organise a flattering photo of myself. This one, taken in the early hours of the morning, doesn’t show my best side. I had been rudely awakened and, even more rudely, picked up bodily from my comfortable position on top of the gas heater.
The woman has put all sorts of fleecy woolly blanket things on my bed but it’s just not good enough. Doesn’t cut it.
If she flashes that phone at me one more time I will rip a piece out of her leg. I may do so anyway.